I do not know how to start this post. It seems I have ran out of lines to say but I know there's a need for me to express. So what exactly do I feel right now? First, I'm feeling a rush of emotions I have never felt in my entire life before. It's convoluted and complex. There's both excitement and fear. Totally opposing forces that keeps my heart beating rapidly to God knows how many times per minute. And this scares me.
A deep sigh escaped my chest. (*sigh*)
LOVE really works differently over any other emotion. It's highly unstable and unpredictable but still it is the most reliable of all. It is bound to cause you to experience pain in varying degrees of excruciation but it can also cause you to experience sheer BLISS like no one else felt before. Now, I'm asking, is LOVE worth the risk? Am I ready to step out of my comfort zone and experience it all over again?
For most parts, it's the uncertainty that causes the fear. The mind in its brilliance definitely knows how to concoct a mixture of thoughts enough to poison you heart with all the doubt in the world. These are the very thoughts that make me weak, vulnerable, and totally distrusting. These are the feelings I should learn how to quell. These are the very feelings LOVE should turn the tides on. I should trust LOVE more.
But then there is really no right way of feeling LOVE. I could not contain it and mold it the way I wanted it to be. I know the outcome I want but the road going there is definitely one big question. I just need to have FAITH, learn PATIENCE, and simply rest on our promise.
There will always be uncertainty because if there is none, surprises wouldn't be surprises anymore. Life would suddenly become predictable and love will be totally boring. So uncertainty should be the least of my worries. It is MYSELF that I should tend to because the answer to the future lies in my OWN hands. As always in life, there is a CHOICE.
And my choice, LOVE is worth all the risk.
In the film Y Tu Mama Tambien, one of the characters said that "Life is like a surf, so give yourself away to the sea." Somehow, this is how I feel right now. One cannot be involved with LOVE and not surrender everything to it. For if it not, that would be entirely selfish or worse it is a complete lie.
As they say, it does not do to dwell on the past, uncertainty, fear, or doubt and forget to live.
There will always be uncertainty because if there is none, surprises wouldn't be surprises anymore. Life would suddenly become predictable and love will be totally boring. So uncertainty should be the least of my worries. It is MYSELF that I should tend to because the answer to the future lies in my OWN hands. As always in life, there is a CHOICE.
And my choice, LOVE is worth all the risk.
In the film Y Tu Mama Tambien, one of the characters said that "Life is like a surf, so give yourself away to the sea." Somehow, this is how I feel right now. One cannot be involved with LOVE and not surrender everything to it. For if it not, that would be entirely selfish or worse it is a complete lie.
As they say, it does not do to dwell on the past, uncertainty, fear, or doubt and forget to live.
Right NOW, I'm taking the risk. Right now, I'm feeling love, living it, and loving it.
__________________
To YOU, I thank GOD for the gift of you.
I pray to have many more SUNRISES with you.
I love you.
No rush, lets take it one day at a time.
I love you.
No rush, lets take it one day at a time.
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